Mitigate the B.L.E.V.E, The Rage

Third & final in the Rage Series. (First is here, second is here).

I.

Cheapen me:
throw my raggedy carcass down the stairs,
spit & piss & eject excrement onto me.
After all,
I wasn’t important to you.
The abundant love in my heart was still
half-empty in your cup.
Toss it out. Just waste my love.
Shit on it, burn holes in it, stab it with a knife,
pour acid on it, & laugh as it disintegrates.
I don’t need it,
I don’t need you.
You aren’t my fountain of endless love-production.
You aren’t a source of
anything
good for me.

II.

I’m determined to forgive you.
I’m going to set myself free,
burn these goddamned ropes off my ankles,
and through (my Memory of) the pain you inflicted
I’ll no longer be your tether ball.
I’ll chew through the bitter skin
and, like a kumquat, it will make the sour flesh
palatable.
Hear me now:
All the times you fucked me over
are filed in the historical archives,
not forgotten,
(Not being fucked over any more)
but are banned from entering
my perfectly sweet, Soft Soul’s
Golden Bubble.

III.

At this moment
I can breathe.
Stars in the heavens,
some bright & others dim,
like fingers & arms raised in praise,
sycamores & tulip poplars,
& countless other trees,
in which a million red-winged blackbirds
woodpeckers & cicadas
are dancing & vibrating,
& all the animals are screaming & singing
in joy:
for the waves rippling over the lake,
the delicious chlorophyllic taste of air,
& for God, who seems to be smiling
in each & every one & thing.