Episode

There's a question inside me & I long for the answer
to fill up the empty box.
The answer isn't in the mirror,
it isn't in this laptop,
it hasn't been seen on TV,
so far it doesn't appear to be
coming forth from inside me.
It's not on the Internet,
not in a book
or in my refrigerator, the cupboards, or in my car.
I've checked all those places.
It could be in a human sized hole in a graveyard in the ground
but I won't know that until...
It certainly isn't in my wallet, and isn't on the wall,
or at the gym, but it could be in a man.
(Their plan is to convince you they
have the answer then lead you on
til you're like an abandoned baby
who gives up.)
The answer might be locked inside the ping pong ball
bouncing chaotically back and forth in my chest.
But it's not locked inside my heart-shaped box,
it's nowhere I've traveled
but maybe I haven't looked thoroughly enough
or maybe I've been looking so hard, so long,
I've forgotten the question
or I'm seeing it all wrong.
Can God even hear me inside these concrete walls?